Sunday 6 March 2022

Maybe ''We Should All Be...”



Imagine your sister didn’t get a promotion just because “na woman na”?
Imagine you found out a female you love and care about didn’t get an opportunity to to go school because, yes… she’s female.
Imagine your best friend, sister, wife, girlfriend or mother earned less than her male colleagues just because… Yeah, you get.. she’s a woman.
Imagine your favorite aunt not getting the ticket to contest for a political position you know she is fit for just because the 35% graciously reserved for women in politics has been met?
Imagine your sister is denied any form of inheritance just because…. She is a she. 

You see where I’m going with this? 
Again, imagine what could have made that man somewhere in the North comfortable enough to come out and contest for the position of ‘woman leader’?
Imagine these and many more.

Now if your felt bad or wan kind imaging any of the above happening to your sister, mother, wife, girlfriend, best friend, auntie, neighbor’s sister or any female in your life, then MAYBE WE SHOUD ALL BE FEMINISTS…

Wait, 
wait, don’t run please.
Hear me out. 
I strongly believe that there are individuals who do not truly understand what feminism is about. 
Somehow, my people (read Nigerians) believe that feminism is a man hating agenda. 


I think the one they are looking for is MISANDRY…which the Oxford dictionary defines as “dislike of, contempt for, or ingrained prejudice against men’’. Ehen… you see? It’s not me that talk it. 

So what really is feminism?
Same dictionary defines feminism to be  “the advocacy of women’s rights on the basis of the equality for all the sexes” simple put, Feminism is about all genders having equal rights and opportunities. It is about respecting diverse women’s experiences, identities, knowledge and strengths and striving to empower all women to realize their full rights… 


How can anyone be mad at this, please?



I know this is not an easy conversation to have, especially with errrm…. our men (lol) and I have tried to avoid writing on this for so long (side eyeing ’Steeeee) but then I came across this very very very stupid question and then the very very very cool answer by oluchukwu_N




What I do not understand is why my desire to be better in life, to earn more, to have a place on the table is seen as me hating men? I believe it is me loving myself enough and wanting what I want for me. 
Why is it frowned at when women want to get equal social, political, educational rights?
Would having these stop me from being able to cook and be a good wife, mother, sister or child? 
Why should a woman always have to prove her worth despite having same qualifications as her male counterparts?
Why should I be paid less for doing the same job as a man just because I am female? (they don’t want us to chill with the big boys, abi?)
Why should I be denied the right to make decisions for myself, my future just because I am female?
Why should every bad driver be ''na woman na, no wonder" as if having a…..errrrm you know…is a major requirement for changing gears.

                                                        

If standing for my self and other women makes me a feminist, then I shall wear my badge with pride!
And all this doesnt mean I would disrespect the males in my life but I will always stand up for what I believe in and for what is right for me.
Please respect me in all my femaleness...


So please, stop depicting doom on feminists and feminism and see it for what it is;  the struggle that will help your wives, daughters, sisters to reach their full potential in whatever sphere they choose to shine in life…

Last last, like Chimamanda said, “I have chosen to no longer be apologetic for my femaleness and my femininity. And I want to be respected in all of my femaleness because I deserve to be.”

So, I will conclude by saying now that you know Feminism is about making the woman better, getting a woman to be seen and heard and allowed to soar, then i think maybe we should really all be feminists... because who doesn’t want their own to soar and shine bright like the diamond she truly is? 

Selah!