If I shan’t ‘gree was a person

It’d definitely be me.

Listen, by the time you read about the level of I shan’t gree-ness I pulled off, you’d agree with me that ‘if I shan’t gree was a person, it would definitely be me’.

Don’t wonder too much, I’ll gist you. 

So back in February ‘24, I saw the promo(?) for the Good News Tour by Marveric  City Music and I saw that they were coming to my state.

I knew I wanted to attend the concert, I wanted to be there so bad and I said to myself:

Self?

Myself said to me: yes?

I said to myself: How do we do this?

Myself said to me: You already know, girl!

So I cooked correct tuwon shinkafa and egusi for The Half and practiced my ‘I wan go concert’ pitch… Cz errm it is going to be in a city almost 5 hours away from home. 

So sha, my pitch worked and we got tickets, not just any ticket, cz oga said “for you to be this excited and even come up with this type of presentation just to attend, I know you really want it.” (Though i secretly think him sef been wan go)

Listen, I didn’t just get tickets, I got Diamond VIP tickets (small thing I for faint with excitement). Like we will be in the front, front, very close to the stage I’d imagine I could see inside their nostrils if I looked well…and we also get to meet with the group and talk to them before the show begins!

So, tickets bought in February,

Concert is in November,

The wait starts,

Me and the calendar became best friends.

March, April, May…..and it was November…yay!!!

My excitement heightened. I could not wait for the day. 

Now tell me why 9 days to the day, I had to be taken to the ER, sick as a dog and I was scheduled for surgery exactly a week to this concert. 

It was at that point I understood why anyone would use the phrase  “you dey whine me?”

Cz what in the what what what is going on?? 

Me that have bought concert clothes and boots, (cz we gon praise ‘n drip) to go and jump and sing and be as loud as I can cz maybe somehow Chandler Moore would hear me and invite me to come and join them to sing. 

That’s how I looked at the devil and I laughed and I said ‘devil’, 

devil said ‘huh’

I said ‘ya not serious, you’ve come for the wrong one’. 

Anyways, I had surgery on the 14th, a week to the concert. It was brutal; excruciating pain doesn’t even begin to describe it. Three days after surgery, I was still in pain but somehow through it, with prayer and shan’t greeness, the thought of canceling never crossed my mind. 

 Two days to the concert, I had to prepare another pitch for The Half to convince him on why I needed to go and how badly I wanted this… bless him, he agreed. 😁

And it was Friday the 22nd!

I had to go see my Dr for a post op check up and off we went!

Listen, when I tell you it was worth every discomfort I felt on the way, I mean that! 

It was a super amazing concert. It wasn’t just a ‘show’, it was a praise and worship session and I am so glad to say “shame on you, devil!

I told you, you got the wrong one!”

So yeah, I didn’t gree and I made it and it was so so great!

Even though I missed the VIP experience of meeting with them before the show started, I am glad I was able to attend at all, and we got our souvenirs saved for us. 

So, yay!

I am so thankful to God that I came out with just scars from the surgery.

I am healing and mending nicely and I am happy!

I say a big thank you to my family, my friends, my Ms and everyone who sent a prayer my way when I was sick.

I am big on the THANK YOU, LORD!!!!! 

Ok, ok let me share more photos and videos and hope by a glimpse, you understand how blessed i feel to have been able to attend the concert.  

                                                 This is the set list if you want to create a playlist

                                                                        Tasha Cobbs

                                                                Chandler Moore

Naomi Raine 

PS: For some reason, videos would not upload, I will add them whenever i am able to.

PSS: I am sorry for the fonts not fonting, i kept trying to fix that but i could not. Anyone know what i can do to fix it?

Mo What?

Mo what? 

Movember! 

What’s that you ask? 

Let me tell you how I found out about it before I tell you what it is. 

Fair deal, yes?

Ok, so I saw a picture of a friend of mine whom I’ve known to keep beards before beard gang became a thing….and he was sans beards!!

He had shaved it all off! 

My flabber was gasted and I had to ask him pe, whattapun?! 

Let’s call this my friend ‘Yellow’ as we go on, shall we? 

Yellow went ahead to tell me he shaved it off for Movember. 

I was wondering if Movember was a babe that got this bros to shave off beards I know he loved to have and flaunt. But let it not be that I am jumping into conclusions, so I asked Yellow warris Movember? 

And he basically said ‘Google is your friend’ without saying ‘Google is your friend’ cz he sent me a link to check it out for myself. 

So the  Movember movement is actually a thing and it’s been around for a while. Google tells me The Movember Foundation is a global charity that funds and raises awareness for men’s health. With the foundation’s mission being to help men live longer, healthier and happier lives.  

It was founded in 2003 by Adam Garone and 3 others, the purpose of this movement is simple; helping men live happier, healthier and longer lives…

This foundation runs an annual charity event, with a goal to change the face of men’s health by encouraging men (who the charity refers to as Mo Bros to get involved… So what men do during Movember is that they grow a mustache for the month, getting friends, family and colleagues to donate to their effort. 

There’s so much more to this foundation, I tell y’all and I’m here for it. I’m glad someone started this for the men to feel seen and heard and cared for cz there are so many causes for women out there and you barely hear of any for men. So please next time you put up a pink ribbon or something in honor of women, kindly add a ‘stach to include the men in acknowledgment of struggles men face and are rarely spoken of cz as the society says they are men!

Well, well, did you know about this? 

No? 

Well, you’re welcome and thanks to Yellow for sending me to find out about it all by myself instead of just telling me. And if this interests you, please go ahead and read up some more about this cause and see if you will be interested in any of the challenges for the charity events. 

Me sef I’ve plucked the two bia bia I have in support of the movement.  

So which of you Vira’s blog bros are going to become Mo Bros after reading this?

As always, thank you for stopping by.

xoxo

Hard Guy in Tha Mud!

Y’all!

Y’all!!! 

Omoooh! 

Let me first of all start by apologizing to all the Mommas I Yimu-ed for being emotional on their babies’ first day of school.

Because, what is this feeling?!

Abi I should go back to school and wait in the parking lot? 

Listen, my heart is too fragile for this, I could literally feel my blood pressure rise after I dropped her off… I am not lying. 

So she was supposed to start on Monday, thankfully it was a public holiday so she did not go. 

So Tuesday, right? Toh, that’s how my chest started doing kikum kikum kikum.

Then I said to myself: self?

Myself said to me: yes?

And I said to myself: What is this feeling?

And myself said to me: if you ask me, na who I go ask? 

So, ladies and gentlemen, as I am sure you already know where this is going, that is how my baby did not go to school on Tuesday. Then today came and as school fees cannot waste, I chopped liver and took my baby to ‘school’ 

My girl!

*wipes lone tear* 

See the thing is this, I didn’t know how fragile me heart really is… I was forming hard guy when planning to register her in school cz a person that would fart and say “Eskiss me”, is most definitely ready to go to school. What I did not know however is that I, the momma was not ready. *insert wailing emoji*

Which is why I shamelessly sat in front of the school for over 20 mins after I dropped her off, contemplating my choices as I may or may not have shed a or some tears. 

And the anty did not send me at all, she waved and said ‘bye sheeee youuuu’.

*Clutches pearls*

So this girl will not even look at me and cry small? 

What a betrayed! 😪   

Y’all!

Y’all, send me hugs. Wish my baby a great ‘school’ year. 

Say a prayer for her and send me hugs as I start planning to buy JAMB forms.

xoxo 

Culture Shock!

Merriam-Webster describes culture shock as a sense of confusion and uncertainty sometimes with feelings of anxiety that may affect people exposed to an alien culture or environment without adequate preparation

Y’all, prepared for some ish I definitely was not, I can tell you that for sure because I have experienced all kinds of this confusion since I got to this Biden’s America and I’ll be gisting you about a few of those. 

So you know how on the 1st of October every year, to celebrate Naija Independence day, no one stays home cz we be outside chilling and chopping wherever we go? Hmmmm that is how on my first 4th of July here, I declared I wasn’t cooking, we shall go out and do this the Naija way.

Haaaaaa *wipes lone tear*

That is how we went out and drove the whole length and width of this town looking for where to eat. Tell me why not even one restaurant was open.

We even drove to the next town about 20 mins away. Guess what? 

Yup, you got it right. It was a ghost town. No food, no hanging out, nada!

So what happens here as against our deck up and go out is everyone stays home and does a bbq; basically hang out with family and friends and throw knock out at night. The knock out is always amazing so I wont complain much.

Now, to the more shocking experience for me… 

That is how I have not gone to church on Christmas Day since I came here oh! Ah, a whole Christmas Day and I’m getting a message the day before about how we should all spend time with family and have a blessed day.

Ahhh! Will  my Christmas cloth wear itself? So there will be no dancing and plenty offerings? We will not stay in church for extra time as our own part of omugwu for Jesus’ birth?

Oya what am I supposed to be doing at home on Christmas Day? No church, no outing cz everywhere is closed as usual. 

#Sigh

Did you just ask yourself what happens on New Year’s Eve and day of? Hmmmm no crossover service, no dancing in church till midnight and screaming ‘happy new year’ at mid night. 

You want to know the worst one of all? 

I was gobsmacked when I realized I would have to pump gas in my car, all by myself! Like why? Why can’t I just sit like the baby girl that I am and have someone else on it like I do back home? Why do i have to come down from the car, take the nozzle and pump? This is definitely something I still can’t get used to and because of this, my tank is always red before I pump gas.

Well, well, what can I say? Na who send me come, abi?

Oh, another one. If you go to buy fresh fish, this is what you will get. No head, no skin….                                 

                                                   

How does a Bachama girl survive this? Fish no head? 

*Wipes lone tear*

Thank God for the African shops that ship full fish as it was meant to be; head and skin intact!

Oh, don’t go and be confused like me when you order fried fish in the restaurants and get this ↓.

And the kind of things my eyes saw in New Orleans when I attended a concert during the Essence festival ehn? Gist for another day.

Sooo, now it’s your turn, tell me about the biggest culture shock you’ve experienced, locally or internationally. 

Xoxo

Ps: there’s  more oh but these are the ones I choose to talk about today, I will fill y’all up with time.

To Thine Own Self, Be True…

Hey Peoples!

It’s been a minute. 

I know, I know… just that life has been lifing.

#whew!

So a conversation happened that got me thinking… so much so that it made me want to get serious-ish with stuff, with the blog and maybe more. 

Ok, let me gist you. The other day, I attended a friend’s birthday party and the celebrant introduced me to another guest and this happened. 

Celebrant to Lady: you’ve met my friend, right?

Lady: No, I don’t think I have.

Me: shakes head as mouth was busy with sweet puff puff

Celebrant to lady: This is AA’s wife.

Lady lights up: Oh, you’re the writer!

Me to myself: Writer bawo? *swallows puff puff*

Me to nice lady: Oh no, I am not a writer.

Nice lady: You know XYZ in Shreveport, right? She told me about y’all and she says you’re a writer.

Me still confused: Yes, I know her but I am not a writer.

At this point, another friend, Momma Ify, who was with us looks at me and says ‘but you write naa, how about your blog?’

Me in a state of lol: Ehn but that is not writing writing like that naa…

At this point, momma Ify went ahead to make my head swell by saying how much of a good writer she thinks I am. I sha stood there accepting the hype but not with full chest cz who are y’all talking about?!

I however remember I met the lady from Shreveport through my blog page on the ‘gram and I thought to myself, so like this now, this lady has been seeing me as, and introducing me as a writer and I’ve never considered myself  one?

What does it even mean to be a writer? I know I enjoy doing this and I started cz I wanted to put down my feelings on stuff, opinions and the occasional amebo out there and for no one in particular, I just wanted a fun type thing. I also started anonymously because I was not confident in my writing and not sure anyone would even be interested in reading it.

But this lady saw me as a writer *sneakering*.  She saw me as more than I saw myself and that made me feel good and then it made me feel bad about myself. I felt good because I felt ‘seen’ then I felt bad because I didn’t see myself. 

I always shied away from saying I had a blog and even when I began to say that I did, I always felt I was not writing anything serious which is why I only sent links to posts to my close friends only. There would be days I’d go through others’ blogs and ask myself why I do not write ‘serious’ stuff in a serious tone like they do. Then I’ll will myself to write like them but whenever I do, it just does not feel like me *does that even make sense?*

Anyways, after thinking long and hard, I have now decided to be me, to embrace my writing style and generally, to myself, be true.

So please allow me to introduce myself…*shouting on top of my lungs* My name is Zandaborom *whispers* and I am a writer.

Stay hydrated.

xoxo

PS: I don’t even know if this post title even gels like that but that was what popped up in my head when I thought of writing about this and I went with it.

WOMAN!

 

That is the only name my Father ever called me. 

Woman… 

I loved being called this by my father. 

It made me feel special. 

So so special.

I was Woman…

Everyday, just me, Woman to my Baba. 

I was happy. 

Sixteen years later, a little girl was born. 

My sister, the loveliest little thing ever and I adored her. I knew I loved her, but maybe I didn’t know  just how much I did till Baba began to call her Woman; I wanted so badly to feel jealous, but  I just could not. I was happy to share my special name with her and our bond grew and grew such that everyone knew she was special special to me.

She was my baby.

Mine to love and spoil and boi, love and spoil her did I do!

I loved her so… so much that I began to tell people I was her mom and I was always happy when those that did not know believed me. 

She was my baby.

From the first time she got a phone, her number was saved as ‘MaGold’ cz that is what she is to me.

She grew up so beautiful, so brilliant and was I proud of her! So so proud. Her intelligence made me feel better about my Olodo-ness as i would tell myself that I must have added part of my brain to hers. Don’t judge me, mans gotta make mans feel better about mans Olodo-ness. 

Now, let me tell you about my baby.

Ma’Gold, the Angel. 

A literal Angel with the sweetest smile ever.

So beautiful, so gentle, did I mention her brilliance? Truly an intelligent young woman.

An academic award winning Architect. 

An obedient lover of God.

A follower of Christ. 

A prayer warrior. 

A beautiful soul. 

A music lover. 

The sweetest girl.

Member, goshi gang. 

A true foodlum

Knowing her equals loving her.

Her beautiful smile would warm up every room she entered.

Her calm nature would bring peace. 

I’m sure if we ever saw her farts, they’d  glitter and her sneeze, like colorful musical notes.

The 2nd ‘Woman’ in Baba’s life.

Ma’Gold

My big brother’s baby.

My baby brother’s twin.

My sisters’ ajebo baby sis. 

Sammy’s Babies…

My baby girl…

On this international women’s day, I celebrate you. 

With tears in my eyes as i write this. I celebrate you. 

I celebrate your life, Ma.Gold.

I thank God for the opportunity to have loved you, you knew without a doubt how much I loved you. 

I will not be sad today, I promise.

I will close my eyes picture how on the 20th of January 2024 heaven must have erupted in applause when you walked in and Baba walking down the street of gold, with a smile and hug he must have asked ‘ah ah, Woman what are you doing here now?’

I love you forever and a day, Pwanedo Alson.

The One where our hearts broke…

Hey y’all!

How’s it been? 

If you know me, then you know how much I have loved and continue to love the sit com ‘FRIENDS’. 

I have watched every one of the 10 seasons and 236 episodes of friends that aired. From ‘The one where it all began’ to the last one also known as ‘The one where they all say goodbye’

I had the CDs, I had the DVDs and when I could, I downloaded all episodes and then I had a monthly subscription of HBO Max just so I can watch friends anytime I felt like. I honestly would go months without watching anything but friends on that app.

I know for sure I have watched every single episode at least 3 times. I'm pretty sure its way more than that as it has been my go to show for when i need a laugh, when I am bored, when I am in my feelings, whiling away time, or i just need the tv on. 

Yup, I love FRIENDS that much. I don’t think there’s an episode I did not love.

I love all the characters but my faves from the very get go have been Chandler and Pheobe. I absolutely love his character, his mannerisms, his facial expressions….njust everything about the character. Plus for some reason, he kinda reminds me of my uncle P. Maybe that is why I got drawn to his character. Who knows? What I know though is that Chandler Bing always made me laugh. I love Chandler Bing.

Now imagine my shock when I woke up on that fateful day to read that Matthew Perry had passed on.

I was pained. It hurt so much as though I knew him personally. The only other celebrity death that moved me to tears was that of Chadwick Boseman, I know, I know, let’s not even talk about that for now. 

Matthew Perry died not long after he wrote a book. In the book, Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing: A Memoir he talked about the years and years of struggle with drugs and also about the peace he found in sobriety. I have not read this book but I have read review and seen snippets of his book tour.  I feel sad that he died at a time he chose to open up about this with the intention of helping others who have the same struggle.

It is crazy seeing what drug addiction has done and is doing to people, and we all may know one or 2 persons struggling with addiction or even have them in our families, I pray they get the help they need before it is too late. Most importantly, I pray they want the help to make it right.

Indeed, if this were an episode of Friends, it would be titled ‘The One where our hearts broke’. 

xoxo

For my girl… and yours!

Every year since the year 2011, the world has celebrated the Girl Child and every year has had its unique theme.

Basically, this day was created to recognize girls’ rights and the unique challenges girls face around the world.  I will not go into the history of this and all and if you want to know, google is ya friend…😁

This year, the 11th of October was the day for the girl child and the theme was ‘Invest in the Girls’ rights: Our leadership, Our wellbeing.’ Straight to the point abi? So I do not need to say anything more about this. The theme says it all. 

What amazes me though is the fact that even now, there are people who do not think the girl child needs or deserves to the ‘invested’ in. It is funny because when I look around me, I see the girl child doing great things, I see girls breaking all kinds of records, I see girls achieving so much, I see girls making their parents proud in every aspect of life. 

I do not understand it as everyday when I look at  my child, I am always in awe! 

My girl.The past week, I got emotional whenever I looked at her; thinking about how she was about to turn one already. 

I know right? No be yesterday I born am?

*wipes lone tear*

See ehn, one thing this momma knows for sure is that I am going to invest in her rights, in her well-being and in everything that concern her and I know I have to start this investment now. I have to start sowing seeds in her life, I have to start calling forth things that are not as though they were. I know I have to ‘speak’ the kind of life I want her to have in future. 

My first choice of investment in her life is prayer. 

My Pwavira… my little feisty munchkin with the sloppiest kisses, as your mother, I bless you! 

As your mother, I speak grace, grace, grace, grace upon your life.

As your mother, I pray the fruits of the Spirit grow and manifest in you. 

I speak the blessings of a mother over you.

My girl. 

My gift from God, the favored of God… amen to your aunt TBK prayer; you will surely run, overtake and win always!

I stand upon The Word as I declare no weapon fashioned against you shall prosper; the Lord shall contend with anyone who contends with you… 

Pwavira, you will excel in all you do. You will reach the peak of any mountain you choose to climb.

Your name will be heard and you will be known in your generation for greatness. 

You will be humble even as you excel, you will know empathy, you will love and I pray you be loved the way you want to be loved and the way you deserve to be loved.

May laughter never cease in your life… 

May your beauty within surpass your physical beauty.

Mamah, as you turn one today, I do not have the words to express my gratitude to God for these 365 days shared with you. I have felt all kinds of emotions, I have discovered emotions I did not know existed… 

All I can say for now is Usoko Homumpwa!

And to every ‘girl child’ in my life, I pray same for you. I look forward to seeing you all grow and become the bests and greatests in your generations.  My Keeks, my Ro, Zee & Mimi, Jayda & Tehila, Ace, Isabel, Eneyi, Kidada, Lentapwa, Sophia, Kamila, Zara, Carla &Casey, Mitchel & Maya, Pearl, Ruby, Zoe, Aafreen & Salma, Lolu, Beulah, Tabitha, Vira & Pwamoreino, Finyi, Yasmin & Nadine, Abby, Kayla, Jayda, Cordelia, Khadija, Jahzeerah & Jacqlin, Jaleesah, Petra & Epiphany, Sheila & Janelle, Michelle, Latisha & Tehila, Aurelia, Aisha & Sa’adatu, Kiiva & Talia, Diane, Ellen and my brand new babies, Esther and Elizabeth… 

I pray your worth is seen, I pray for the grace and strength and provision for us parents to invest in your lives, I really can’t wait to see who you all grow up to become, I however know that you will make us proud, I know you will break and shatter whatever glass ceiling you choose to aim. Stay loved, babies!

To our dear angel baby, Kasinma, you were dearly loved.  You are still loved and sorely missed. 🕊

Today, I celebrate mine and every amazing little girl in our worlds.

xoxo

Ps: Inzei and Lu, you too… 😁

So this is how they ‘use’ to do true true?

People of God! Let me gist you about the first time I got invited to a birthday dinner at a restaurant. 

You’re wondering why this is worth writing about abi? Well, it is because it is one of those birthday parties that I have been hearing about where you attend and you pay for what you eat! 

Ehen, now you see why it is something to write about abi? Especially for someone who the Naija is still very very strong in. The way I know it is you get invited, you dress up on the day of and go, you chop plenty food and come back home very happy… so as not to feel bad that you’ve chop awoof, you buy gift. Abi that’s the point of buying ‘present’, no?

Anyways, though I had initially planned not to stay for the dinner party as I did not have a babysitter, but had to ‘show face’, the plan was to go there, sit and make small talk for about 10 mins, drop the celebrant’s birthday gift, apologize and leave. But as I was sitting and waiting for my 10 mins oh… just because I am polite na… that is how the server came to ask how the payment was going to be.

Now, tell me why this server decided to stand in my very before to ask ‘are you paying individually or as a group?’ I was trying to unlook and brother man was looking straight at me. 

In my head I was thinking ‘Oga, did they send you to me?

Did you see me eat anything?

Can’t you see I am trying to unlook?

Honestly, it felt very very uncomfortable especially as I wasn’t even sure what their plan was as it was a surprise birthday dinner for the celebrant. So there I was sitting uncomfortably not sure what the plan even was! 

Anyways, someone eventually answered and said ‘we’ll pay individually’ and the Naija in me sha thought ‘ah! So this is how you people use to do true true true’ so what if I had come in my true Naija ‘come chop’ mode without money to pay? That’s how I would have been drinking water and eating the free bread rolls,  smiling and nodding? Abi I would have rolled sleeves and washed plates after the parry?

Is it good? 

Ko da now! 

See this cultural differences? Though not all of them are shocking they will always be a thing. Some still amaze me and I just shrug at some and I don’t give some second thoughts anymore. But one thing I know for sure is that I am and will still be a Naija girl and a strong arewa one always. I just have to get used to how they do things here. But please, I like free food, lets be guided!

Till next time…

xoxo

Life As Vira… The Real Vira.

So I hear my momma has been telling you all about Life as Vira. 

Vira as in….me?!

I wonder what she has been saying considering the fact that I just made it to this side of life…

Can I sue her for this? For impersonation or something?

Well, while I think about that, please allow me respectfully send warm greetings to you all and to tell you a wee bit about me… the real Vira.

* bobs head to the real Vira Slim Shady*

* As we all know, my name is Vira, short for Pwavira; a name my momma had decided to give to me long before she met me… and I’ve heard her say as the years went by and with so much that had happened, my name holds an even more special meaning to her. Pwavira means “God has given you to me”. Maybe someday she will tell you all about it but as it is not my story to tell, I shall be moving on.

* I was born on the 29th of October, I weighed 3kg and was 19 inches tall, and I am a lot bigger and taller now. 😁

* My mama says I am a miracle, a testimony and an answer to not just her prayers, but the prayers of my aunties, mommas, grandmas, friends and well wishers. Someday, I will ask her what she means and I will come tell you about it… after all, I am the real Vira and this is about me.

* bobbing head to The real Slim Shady*  You know, cz the real Vira is standing up… 

I’m sorry

I digress. 

* My mama says I am fearfully and wonderfully made in the image of God… what a wawuuu! I must really be special! She said I am for signs and wonders and a blessing from the Lord which maketh rich and adds no sorrow… good stuff, good stuff to hear, I tell you! 

* Wait, you all know I am cute, right? 

   Right?  😁

* My mama also said God has great thoughts concerning me, thoughts of peace and not evil. She says I am a precious jewel in God’s hands… how amazing this sounds!

* I am mostly a good baby, I do not stress her much but I tend to keep her up at night and I know she loves a good sleep; I do this for fun, just because I can.

* When I sneeze, I sneeze biiiiig! Rarely once but 3 or 4 times at a go. Maybe this means I have some super powers 🤔… we shall be looking into this in the future. 

* I have a head full of hair; my mama said she prayed about this and I am glad God answered her prayer cuz if you know my mama’s hair situation, you’d be thanking God for me also …. Need I say more?  

* My ears are not pierced yet because it is not allowed here till I am 3 months old.. I don’t get why, but i hope that is enough time for the parents to save and get me some good ice… diamonds, that is. 😜

* I fart glitters

* My mama is obsessed with me. I catch her starring at me all the time and I just chill and maintain beauty while I think of how to use this obsession to my advantage. 

* I already know I am loved and I know my mama has the best set of friends and family who love me. Now I need to think of how to get them wrapped around my tiny little fingers…

* My mama says I look like her, my godmother, Chops says I look like her, my aunties all say I look like them… i guess I will decide to look like the highest bidder at some point. 

* I was welcomed into the family of the Most High by being dedicated to God in church. It was a beautiful ceremony and looked like fun for the adults as they ended the ceremony with a lot of food and drinks, which i think is unfair as I, the guest of honor was not offered anything to eat. No fair! 😠

Errrm… what more should I spill about me? 

*Oh yeah, have i said I keep my mama up at night… just cuz I can? 😁

* I do not cry during bath time. Yeah, I know I am cool like that. 😎

* I do not like it when my hair is washed or combed…. Largely cuz I do not trust my mama with my hair. not with dem edges i see on her. 😏

Well, I guess this is it about me for now, I will update you when there is more to tell. 

I have also been thinking about it and since it appears you seem to enjoy my mama’s gists, musings and occasional amebo, I will graciously allow her continue to use my name on the blog… for now:

which means my lawyers will not be contacting her lawyers…. for now. 

Thank you all for reading about me and also, allow me to thank everyone for the hearty welcome to the world. It has been amazing and full of love since I got here and I cannot wait to meet you all.

I wish you all a very very happy new year; may all your dreams, wishes and prayers for the new year come true. 

I love you.

XOXO

Pwavira.

The real Vira.

PS.

Thank you for indulging my crazy mama by reading along as though I wrote this, I am sure it means a lot to her but let’s not encourage such behavior in the future, please.

PSS.. 

I am officially handing over the rights to use my name to her before I decide if to call my lawyers.

Wetin I go find for Sokoto… My Visit To New York City.

Hey peoples!

You’re probably wondering what I am on about today again abi?

Well, if you are familiar with this saying, you already know how it ends…

‘Wetin I go find for Sokoto dey for my sokoto’….

So I visited the Big Apple.

With a mission.

I was prepared for this trip, I planned for weeks, I was super excited to get there and be a New Yorker and all of that. But my main reason for going to New York City was something I so much looked forward to, I could not wait. I even bought a selfie stick so I do not miss a moment of it. 

You’re wondering what it is, right?

Well, I was given the opportunity to choose where I wanted to spend Christmas and I chose NYC, because, well… it is New York City #duh, secondly, I really wanted to see/feel/experience snow. Yes, this Naija girl had not seen snow before so I thought, why not and where best?

That is how local girl was flown to New York City. 

Hmmmm the cold that grabbed me the minute we landed, I endured because I am in New York City na and I will see snow, abi? And the colder it gets, the more chances that it will snow, abi? Also, the thought of snapping photos in the snow, doing the whole snow angel ish fueled me. 

This was going to be me in all the plenty snow I was looking forward to.

I was prepared, the weather app was my best friend, it forecasted snow from the day after my arrival, all was good with me, I could not wait. 

My brothers and sisters, dudes and dudettes, ladies and gentlemen, that is how I spent 7 good days in New York, one tiny flake of snow like this, my eyes did not see. My fingers and toes, I could barely feel because the cold, the cold, the cold!!!!  *wipes lone tear*

That is how vacation was over, I carried myself back to my small town and a few days later, guess what? It snowed!

Yup, it snowed here, where I was told it had not snowed in about 4 years… ehn, it was not much, it was like two Naira snow that basically melted before it touched the ground but it did snow! 

Ah, come and see how local girl ran out to enjoy the snow… I did not care if anyone was looking at me, I made sure I enjoyed the moment. I was happy, I saw it, I felt it, I let it fall in my mouth… I was a happy somebody y’all!

This was me… with way less snow. 😒

Well, well, apart from the snow disappointment (which was major) the visit was cool, I visited really cool places and I had fun. As a true fan of the tv show Friends, I had to go to Central Park… it is huge but I did not stay long as it was super cold.  I visited Madam Tussaud (where I had a nice conversation with Thor and he told me I was worthy of Mjolnir, I may or may not be lying about this). I also visited the famous Times Square, Rockefeller center, China town, Broadway, Radio music hall, Fifth avenue and Carlos Barkery!

There were other places I wanted to visit but at some point, going out felt like punishment as the temperature was in the minuses so I advised myself accordingly. It was a fun visit altogether though I was snow heartbroken.  

Now, would I want to go back anytime soon? Hmmm no, I do not think so. Why, you ask? That city is basically a bigger Lagos with better light and nicer cars and taller buildings (ok, ok, maybe a whole lot nicer than Lagos but you get the point)  There was always crazy traffic, trash on the road sides, people everywhere, roadside food vendors, cars honking, cab guys driving like mad folk and cussing at each other… kilode?!  And I was even in Manhattan which is supposed to be the Lekki of NYC. Nah, I like my sanity please, plus the city did not keep to its promise of snow (yes, it is still paining me).

So… that is it about my visit to NYC, I will be back with gist of my visit to Las Vegas *does the sign of the cross*

XOXO 

Xtra! Xtra!!

 Read all about it! 

Holla peoples! It’s been ages, right? I do not know what happened to me but these past months, it feels like my fingers just refused to cooperate with the keypad even though I’ve been gisting y’all in my head.

As always, I say a big thank you to all those who checked on me and kept visiting the blog even when I do not put anything up.

So… this post really doesn’t have a bearing, I just want to gist you general gist about this place that I live and all the kinds of things my eyes have seen in this Biden’s America. I’ll tell y’all  what has stood out, surprised or vexed me in the past year I’ve been here.

You ready? Ok, let’s gist…

In case you are still wondering, yes, na okra… (i know, i know, it’s okro we knoweth) on a drink. And to this day!

To this very day, I’m still wondering what it is doing on a cup, then how in the world do you go about it? Take a sip of the drink, chop small kubewa, another sip, eat a shrimp? I don’t know and we did not bother to find out as no one touched that drink. The drink is called a Bloody Mary, in case you see it on a drink menu, you can like to skip it… you’re welcome.

I found out there are no public transportation in this town! Yes, it is a small town but not that small. Even small keke they don’t have. I keep wondering how people without cars manage, though I see some walking around and i really wonder how they manage it all together. This is a town with a population of 37,000 people! You get my concern now, right? Maybe i should buy small keke or start doing ‘along’ self.

Moving along, the road rules here include the fact that one can make a right turn even if the light is red. Just be sure it’s safe to do so. A person must change their ‘vehicle registration plate’ aka number plate and their driver’s license within 60 days of moving to a new state. Oh, people who ride motorbikes have same rights to the roads, so you’ll never see a bike by the side of any car waiting, they will take up space on the lane and be feeling cool…. 

Just like this uncle that just stood in my very before…

I’m not sure why I’m beefing sef. 🙈 

Ah, the summer here ehn, the summer is bloody! It be summering like say na fight.

 At some point, it was as hot as Yola with 37 degrees! Yeah, you read that right. It was crazy but it’s getting so much better now.

Oh, have I mentioned that they love their okra? After the okra in the drink, I got some in my salad and I can’t stop  wondering why? Why? Why?

 

Well, for me, if it ain’t in a soup, I don’t want it. Kalas!

Then I saw these in Walmart… 

I’m still wondering why…

Moving on… again…

This town is known for their mini meat pies; which are really nice but the thing that stands out for me is that the pies are served with some kind of dipping sauce. I’ve never tried the sauce cuz my Naija self knows that it is juice or minerals we drink when we eat meat pie. Abi?

Oh, another thing… there are a lot of elderly people who go shopping all by themselves and i always feel bad when i see them trying to get stuff off the shelves… the home training in me makes me stop to help them every now and then but I can’t stop wondering why they have to come all by themselves and no one really bothers to help them. 

I’ve also noticed some crosses and flowers by some road sides when we travel and I figured there might have been fatal accidents there and the loved ones choose to do that in honor of their loved ones. So I made a note to count how many of such I’d see on an hour journey to the neihbouring  town and I saw 3… yup, 3 (I sigh in Benin -Ore road or is it Yola - Gombe road?) those places would have been filled with flowers and crosses that there won’t be any ‘roads’ left to pass. 

Now, while that might not be all there have been, I believe they are few because the roads are good. No potholes, no unknown objects flying in the air and all that. 

Lastly but definitely not the least, NEPA has taken light just 3 times in the past 18 months since I’ve been here. Twice was because of a storm and the 3rd time, a transformer went booom! And all three times, power was restored in less that 2 hours!

I have had the opportunity to travel to some big and other smaller cities and I will tell you what I think about them, for now, these are some of the things about my small town. 

So like the terminator, I’ll be back! 

With gists…

XoXo